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17 Feb 2004

Crushed
I really love my gf and we had great times but she told me the weekend that Im embarrasing to go out with or be with. Im not a terrible looking guy and i eat quiet and with my mouth closed and im a bit hairy not bushy just some on my chest and legs! She told me i eat funny, walk funny, look funny, act funny, etc. It carried on! I really dont feel good about myself after all that! And I dont wanna go through all the bad things again! She is not perfect either but it never bothered me! How can i feel good about myself if my "GF" say things to me like that?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear Self-Esteem,
Don't allow this immature, silly little girl, upset you by her insults. It sounds like she isn't yet grown-up enough to have a proper relationship with a man, and invented excuses to enable her to get out of this relationship, and look for someting else. Sadly, she's unlikely to find someone as sincere and concerned as you are, but that's her concern. You can tell her that, now that she's mentioned it, YOU feel embarassed to be seen out with someone so immature and cruel to a person who cares about her and has treated her kindly.
Recognize that when someone is so blindly cruel, that tells us an awful lot about her, and tells us ( and you ) nothing at all about you. It's like a barking dog --- it tells us the dog is upset or excited, but it doesn't say anything at all about those of us who get barked at.
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