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15 Mar 2004

Dagga abuse
Last year around September my sonwho is 15years old started taking dagga, after being admitted in hospital and going through rehab he stopped smoking. Lately I have come to realise that he is smoking it again. He says the feeling he gets from taking dagga is the wonderful feeling. I do not know what to do because he does not want to quit, neither go and see the doctor or physocologist.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear Elsa,
Well, what you describe does sound rather odd. There's nothing paticularly wrong wih a man forming a friendship with a gay man, but there's something wrong with a married man forming an emotional relationship, with another man or woman. Maybe he's just a very lonely man who is getting over-excited about this friendship from another man, and he isn't used to such attention and wants a chum. But his silence when you confronted him, and his hours in the bathroom specially making himself attractive before such a meeting, does sound rather suspicious.
There's not a lot you can do at this stage, as in any other situation where there's some possibility of your spouse forming too close a relationship with someone else, except to talk about it and to make it clear that you can't acept any infidelity, physical or emotional, with someone else ; and that if he has found any problems in his relationship with you, he owes it to you to talkm it over with you, and to join you in mariage counselling, if needed.
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