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21 Feb 2003

DOC - PLS HELP!!!
Hi Doc

It is me again! You must be getting a bit tired of me, actually I am getting a bit tired with myself.
I must say that I am extremely over joyed at the fact that I am getting my life back on track, by the way I did not tell you - I stopped seeing my counciller and I feel even better about my life. What upset me about her was that she just wanted to force me to go on anti-depressants, she just kept pushing it - that was why I had asked you in one of my previous postings if you could make a deduction after one session that a person "needed" anti-d's. Well a friend of mine just said that all I needed to get through this was to be honest with myself and find my inner strength to "find" myself again. And you know what she was right.... THANK GOD for real friends. I have now started gyming again ( i need to lose two years of weight-gain) which is going great, already lost three kg's in two weeks, I have not changed my eating habits much, I dont eat less - I eat better. I am so full of life lately and I feel "ALIVE" again. Everything was going so great (even though I got robbed of my phone) when guess who called. Yes my ex - unfortunately him and his uncle were parked outside his complex when they got hijacked - his uncle is in a coma and he was shot in the arm - but he is fine THANK GOD. My problem is that was so shaken to hear this I felt scared and just wanted to cry. He has told me that experience made him realise how much he loved and that he never wanted to lose me, Now I am in turmoil I don't know what to do, a whole rush of emotions flooded over me, I love him but dont want to jump back into a relationship - I feel that him and I should start a new friendship first, because I am still too hurt and raw inside to just jump back into his arms - actually I am scared as hell to love him the way I used to. I love him in many ways and I dont want to make that mistake or lose him as a friend.
PLS HELP any advice would do.
Answer 451 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear sadeyes,
Pleased to hear about how well you have been doing from your own good efforts and hard work !
About the Ex ---Sounds like a wise conclusion -- don't start off where you left of, especially during the shock phase of a hijacking. But by all means, if it feels right for both of you, start aain a the beginning. Gently, gradually, get to know each other again. He will have been changed by his odeal ; and you have been giving yourself a meaningful makeover. So you're two somewhat different people --- get to know each other now, and see what develops.
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