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12 Dec 2005

Don't want to
I have this strange death wish where I get pulled over by the police. I then pull a toy gun on them and as a result get shot and killed by them. I am not at all suicidal, just really want to do this. I am a 31 year old married woman with one kid, and when I think of leaving them behind, I don't really care. I am bipolar, but feels quite normal, and I'm happy with my medication.
Answer 322 views

01 Jan 0001

Sometimes one may have most of the disabilities and disadvantages of a severe depression but not feel noticeably sad --- and this might be the case with you right now. You are describing feeling suicidal, and rather obsessed with a way to commit suicide by forcing a situation in which someone else will kills you. And if you feel uncaring about leavi g behind your husband and child, this sounds like the emotional blunting of some severe depressions. DO, please, arrane promptly to see a good local psychiatrist as an emergency, for a full assessment, telling him exactly what you have told us, and seeking advice on a revision of your medication adn perhaps adding CBT counselling, to relieve this dangerous degree of depression.
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