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04 Feb 2013

False freinds have hurt my mom
My mom lives in a complex and she is a pretty private person. Early 70''s.

The one lady started visiting her and they became good friends.

This person''s circle consists of 3 other women who then started visiting and staying for long periods having tea and biscuits. My mom saw them as real friends.

Now one of the circle has come back from an extended holiday and suddenly my mom is ignored. She is very hurt but won''t say anything. I feel like saying something I really do.

The initial one is still friends but the other 2 (since their friend is back) now do not bother with her and have not invited her to join any of the activities although when their friend was away many plans were made.

My mom has never trusted people easily (with good reason) and she is slow to make friends. Now this.

I guess she was just a good substitute whilst their pal was away.
Answer 250 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Sounds distressing, but "saying something" can also backfire. From your message, she apparently still has her initial friend, and its a couple of others who have decided to spend their time diffferently - life happens like that. Maybe there are other people accessable where she lives, who might become better and more reliable friends ?
Maybe encourage her to speak gently to the one whi is still friendly, and just ask what happened to the others ?
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