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13 Aug 2008

Feel like klling my 9yr old
Hi,

Not that I will do it, I just feel I could kill my 9 year old daughter. She is a good girl, very intelligent and wise and smart. She listens but oh damn, it is the times when she doesn’ t listen that I could take her sweet head and smash it against the wall.

I love her with all my heart. She is my miracle baby and I am doing everything I can for her. I live for her. I am a single mother of 41 so the age gap is big. Maybe it is me that is not so lekker, I am sure my daughter wants to kill me to. At times.

As it is only the two of us we have a very close, wonderful and loving relationship. SHE JUST DOESN’ T WANT TO CLEAN UP AFTER HERSELF!!!!! Is she to young to grasp the concept of cleaning up after oneself?

She has chores…  feeding the cat, dog and mice. Picking up the dogs poo in the house (still a baby, she makes oopsies in the house at times). She is suppose to keep her room clean and weekends vacuum it. That is all she does. My mother tells me it is to much, because she still has homework to do. I want her to be an independent person, not to rely on other people to much, mother says that is wrong as well. Oh that is another subject all together.

I want to know, do I take my daughter for a hearing test? Because damn I can only repeat myself so many times.
How much chores are enough for her for during the week and at weekends? I told her that if she doesn’ t start cleaning up after herself, I will get a domestic worker and pay her with her pocket money.

Do you think it is me at my age becoming full of crap? I had a hysterectomy, don’ t take any hormone pills and I feel great, ok sometimes I do feel like a witch that fell of her broom and let rip with swear words, but it doesn’ t last long. Call it “ mood swings”  ever hear of it? It feels like at these times I am the only one in the world that has them.

Oh well, now at work and she is at school. I do feel horrible and moaning at her last night and this morning. I love her with all my soul.

Thanks for your advice and not judging me for feeling this way at times.


Answer 324 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

what an alarmingly violent way you are expresing yourself. Kids can be annoying at times, even frustrating. But do you really have to demand absolute obedience and that she listen breathlessly to your every word ? Is that how you were as a child ? When youwere 9, did you infallibly clean up after yourself ?
YOu refer to sanctions when she doesn't keep to these rules about chores --- are there any rewards or encouragements for doing any of the chores ?
And how often do you tell her how much you love her, or explain why you may over-react at times when she's frustrating ?
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