Ask an expert

04 Mar 2003

frustrated sexually
Dear Doc plse help I am woman in my late 40's divorced not in a relationship seems to meet all the wrong guys, either married or the ex wife's giving them hassels. My problem ...I am horny all the time. I am too shy to go into a "shop" to get me something to help myself. Plse can you give me advise.

Answer 418 views

01 Jan 0001

Using a vibrator after becoming accustomed to manual stimulation is kind of like switching from driving a stick to an automatic: You don't have to work as hard and you don't stall as often, so you can relax and enjoy the ride. If you haven't experienced orgasm yet, a vibrator might do the trick to get you over the top.
Different vibes provide different stimulation, so experiment and choose your favorite.
Electric vs. battery: Battery-powered vibrators, like the Pocket Rocket offer more freedom of movement, while electric ones, such as the Hitachi Magic Wand last longer.
Clitoral vibes: Smaller heads, like those of the Tender Touch Massage Kit deliver more focused clitoral stimulation, and larger heads, like those of the Rechargeable Wand spread the vibrations out.
G-spot stimulation: Choose a curved, firm vibe for effective G-spot massage. Try the Clearly G or the Come Here.

Position Yourself
Lay on your back with vibrator in hand, positioned on your clitoris.
For variation, try lying on your vibrator, clenching it between your legs, or propping it against your body.
More ideas: Stand up, lie in the bath (waterproof, battery-powered only, like the Rocket Launcher), or squat.
Put a towel or cloth between your clit and the vibrator to ease yourself into the action.

Ready, Set, Go!
Turn your vibrator on and start by running it all over your body.
When you're ready, put a little lube on your clitoris and near your vaginal opening. (Try Liquid Silk.) Drop the tube of lube into a glass of hot water first if you want it warmed up.
For multi-speed vibrators, start on low and work your way up.
Breathe deeply. Feel free to fantasize, read erotica, or watch a video while using your vibe.

Find the Spot
Vary the speed, motion, and position of the vibrator to keep things interesting.
As you get close to orgasm, back off to stay on the delicious edge a while longer.
Enjoy rocking your pelvis while placing a long, slim vibrator, such as the Slim Classic into your vagina.
Try a curved vibrator, face up, to massage your G-spot during insertion. Our favorite is the Clearly G.

Playing with Your Partner
Vibrators are an addition to, not a replacement for, partner sex. Ask your lover to join you sometime!
Show your partner how you like it done. Masturbating for a partner can be very intimate and sexy, too.
The Remote Butterfly Vibe allows your partner to staff the controls and apportion your pleasure.
If he's open to it, try using a slender vibe with a flared base, like the Tailspin to stimulate a male partner's prostate.

Recommended Products:
Toys: Hitachi Magic Wand, Tender Touch Massage Kit, Clearly G, Fukuoku, Pocket Rocket
Books: Good Vibrations: The New Complete Guide to Vibrators, Sex for One, The New Good Vibrations Guide to Sex
Videos: Self Loving, Celebrating Orgasm, How to Female Ejaculate

Call JT Publishers (011) 614 - 1911 for a free catalogue and you can do a mail order. If you live in Gauteng, you can visit the "Women Only" store, and see there range of vibrators, however it is by appointment only. Call Glenda (011) 787 - 1222
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
Voting Booth
Have you entered our Health of the Nation survey?
Please select an option Oops! Something went wrong, please try again later.
34% - 9270 votes
66% - 17922 votes