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08 Dec 2004

guilt<br>guilt
Thanks for your messages, I note that CS hasn't replied yet, not too good for the self esteem!!!

Have had depression for 20 years, no known reason and have now given up looking for one. My husband doesn't believe in depression and to talk to him about how I really feel - Ha how do you tell the person that loves you that you don't want to live anymore. How do you look at your children and know that you don't want to live.. Then how do you live with the guilt of feeling like this.

Had a breakdown on Friday and saw dr. On medication again, waiting for it to kick in, but feel like a zombie! Dr wanted to admit me, but what about children?

Answer 381 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

I am always impressed about how often people develop a problem over the course of YEARS, and then, when they decide to seek help, want an instant response. I flatly and perpetually refuse to EVER undertake to respond to ANY message within a day or two. Be realistic. If the shrink you PAY to see you can take days ( in some cases even weeks ) to give you an emergency appointment --- am I really supposed to be chained to my computer 24/7 ?
For your marriage problems, which might well be playing a role in perpetuating your depression, see a marriage cousellor, preferably with your husband taking part, too. You did the right thing in seeing your doctor --- it is titally impossible, EVER, for any online service to provide direct treatment or to deal with emergencies. I'm pleased to hear you have started on medication, and hope you start to feel some benefits from it soon. Think seriously about your doctor having wanted to admit you. Wouldn't it be possible to make some arangements, with your husband, with family or friends, to look after them during a relatively short admission ?
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