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20 Dec 2002

How do I minimize the pain
I am seeing a guy who is 10 year younger than me and who also works under me and we have been seeing each other for 3 and half years. We have a two year old baby. I trusted him so much but recently I discovered he had seen someone else. He is at college away and I ony get to see him twice every year. I love him and wish I could forgive him so we can move on. I am consumed with jealousy and I have been phoning this other woman wanting to know all the details about this relationship. He says this relationship is over and he loves me and is committed to us but I can not get past this betrayal even though I am desperate to do so. I am in such pain I am even scared I might hurt myself. I am divorced and my ex-husband also cheated on me. My self-esteem has been knocked sideways and i am asking myself whether there is something wrong with me. I know I am driving him even further away with my actions but I can not seem to help myself. I want to do the right thing for me
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Expert
CyberDoc
CyberDoc

01 Jan 0001

Tate, this isn’t my field of expertise, but because I feel that trust is crutial to a relationship, I think you should think long and hard before you go on with this relationship. I really believe that no matter what your faults are, you can’t be blamed for him cheating on you. If there was something wrong with you, he could’ve ended the relationship, but he chose to cheat on you – a sign of dishonest character. It would almost be easier to understand if he was unhappily married to you, but he has none of those things in his defence.
I think I’ve said too much already. Maybe the best would be for you to ask CyberShrink what he thinks. Good luck.
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