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12 Dec 2005

I Feel so alone, so disinterested ,I have energy for nothing.
When you have a purpose in life, when you have someone you REALLY LOVE it makes the world so much easier. I struggle with evrything, nothing to look forward to, nothing to aim for, its all just the same every day, All I have is hope that someday, someone will make me happy. I just waste space on this earth, I just breath air, at the moment I meaningless, I make no contribution, the thing I hate most is feeling like a victim, its the worst thing, but I work on it every day and then I get up go to work and feel so lonely, so out of breath, I feel as if I want to vomit, I cant even pick up the phone and phone for help, I am totally disinterested, I feel so alone.
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Expert
Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
gay, lesbian and bisexual expert

01 Jan 0001

Hi X, welcome to our forum and thanks for posting here.

Your post indicates that you might be clinically depressed - this could explain your sense of boredom, lack of motivation and energy, isolation and your general, pervasive sense of hopelessness. This can be easily diagnosed by your GP or a counsellor, and it is possible that you would benefit from being on anti-depressant medication or a process of counselling. Clinical depression is not akin to having a 'bad hair day' - it has to last longer than two weeks and is usually indicative of a shortage of a particular enzyme in your brain, called serotonin. Anti-depressant medication is designed to remedy serotonin levels but works best when combined with psychotherapy. I accept that you don't have the motivation, or possibly even the emotional energy, to take the step of addressing the problem - but hey, you've posted here and you're aware that you need help. That's important, a significant step, and now you need to follow through. There's no need for you to lead your life feeling as you do - use technology, in the form of professional support, to help you move out of this very uncomfortable space. There's no reason for you not to feel better.

No-one will come rescue you, I'm afraid. Love won't solve your problem - you need to grab the bull by the horns and seek help. I suggest you contact your GP, who hopefully knows you - you don't need to disclose your sexual orientation because this has little to with your being gay - and ask him/her to refer you to a fabulous therapist in your area. If you don't get on with your GP, visit another doctor. But please seek help soon. We're heading into a season that can be very depressing for some people so act now.

You're welcome to post here again and tell us how you're doing.
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