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27 Feb 2004

Is he being childish?
Ok, so now my boyfriend sms's me good morning this morning, so i said morning.I said i miss him.He said he's working this weekend and next weekend so i wont see him for a while, he asked his dad (who he works for) if he can work those weekends.Is he just trying to get back at me and trying to punish or prove a point or something?or does he just need his space?personally i think he's being absolutely rediculous and childish.I'm over it,why cant he just get over it!It hurts that he doesnt wanna see me for 3 weeks.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Fighter, none of you seem to be busy being highly mature and adult about all this, are you ? YOu seem to have thought about the suggestion many have made that you should let him have more space ( many of us would find the relationship you describe having with him, to be smothering and unbearable ) --- but you don't seem ready to act on it and allow him breathing space. You may be driving him away by your persistent desperate attempts to hold him too closely, that's close to the borderline between love and obsession.
Nobody wants to be with anyone else "all the time", except a 2-year-old. See a counsellor and sort out the issues you now raise about your neediness. Only very insecure people feel so uncertain that they could ever actually deserve to be loved, that they require such frequent statements of it.
Once you're able to need less, you'll probably get more.
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