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Question

28 Oct 2009

Is it me?
Dear Doc 

Various men told me that I am attractive/hot/desirable, etc, etc... Personally I do not think that I am all that, but everyone is entitled to his/her opinion... LOL. (Although it makes me feel better about myself). I am a " bit"  overweight and considder myself to be fat. I am working on it and have lost 10kg in 2 months. I must admit - I DO look so much better these days... I always thought (and have received compliments in the past) that I am very good in bed. I enjoy sex tremendously - will have it at any time any place - not scared to try anything to please my fiance. We are currently working hard to sort out an issue that broke my heart. The past 3 times we had sex my fiance would loses his erection while we are still busy. This makes me feel inadequate and I started thinking that there is something wrong with me. Please tell me if there is anything I can do to help him to help us.
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Expert
Sexologist
sexologist

01 Jan 0001

Having a penis that “fails” you is hard for both of the partners. The man feels like a failure and the women tend to feel inadequate. You mention that you are dealing with an issue that broke your heart – not sure if it is something else or this specific concern. The reality is however that the more one stresses about the penis’ performance the more difficult it is for the man to get and maintain the erection. The more he anticipates the penis to fail – the stronger the possibility that it might again. I would suggest that you seek the assistance of a medical doctor to assess if there is anything physically to be concerned about. Sometimes the use of one of the Erectile Dysfunction medications could restore the trust and could overcome the short term crisis.

You are also welcome to contact our helpline – 0860100262 where you could be assisted to get in touch with a therapist as close a possible to you.

Furthermore you are welcome to visit the following website for any more sexual health information and assignments that could be helpful: www.sexualhealth.co.za
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