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30 Jan 2013

IT HURTS!!!!!!
So am seating at my desk doing my job and keeping busy then all of a sudden it hits me ...
this marriage, this relationship is ova ....damn it rily is O-V-E-R....
I stop and stare into space, my eyes whelm up with tears and I get the deepest sense of sadness I have eva experienced...
THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING!!!!!!!!!!

I fill like I have heartbreak stuck in my body but wont cm out .....
I don’ t want to feel this pain!!!

I fill like a computer that has been opened up and all its parts are left broken on the floor,
I feel like I’ m inside a hurricane and everything around me is unravelling and yet here I stand watching it all fall apart...
I take a deep breath and continue staring as one by one everything falls apart...

Everything is falling apart ....I don’ t think my heart understands the message that my brain is trying to convey ......
there is a huge error in communication ..AM I hallucinating!!

Wont someone please come and tell my heart ,
wake me up and make me understand that no matter how many tears I cry,
no matter how sad I become no matter how hard I close my eyes and shut my ears it’ s still O-V-E-R..........

This heartache is turning me into a maniac , my eyes moving round and round to try and hold back the tears , I
have a awkward smile on my face that even I don’ t understand,
I speak fast so no one can hear the pain my voice I won’ t let this heartache come out!!
I won’ t let it be reality how will I cope!? Will i eva stop crying if i start, will my heart eva heal if i let it feel this pain ,will I eva forget!!

I CANT LET THIS HEARTACHE COME OUT!


So many years, so many memories, so much happiness