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31 May 2011

low self esteem
I''m a 43 attractive lady with very low self esteem. I used to be a very confident person, outgoing an vivacious but hav now bcome very inytroverted. Its come to a stage where I''m losing jobs cause of my anxiety an low self esteem at interviews that I''m bcoming more depressed. I''m not sure if its normal to feel nervous and go red when being shown my body language an bein interrogated. I can''t afford psychologists and have to catch black taxis all time that r risky goin to jhb general. I desperately need to get work and can''t understan what''s wrong with me. I''m livin in a commune at moment, for about a year now where atmosphere is very negative and very depressing. Could that hav an effect on me? How do I bcome mor positiv at interviews at jobs. I''m desperate for a job. Plse help...

Thank u cybershrink...
Answer 402 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

See a counsellor and work on raising that self-estem, learning to reconize your own significant worth, gaining self-confidence. As you once were more at ease with others, you can surely get back to that state or better. I understand the problem about finding a source for such help, but maybe your more local clinics could advise, as they are supposed to provide acces to such services.
What worries me is when you refer to "interrogation" and having your body language interpreted - who is doing this ? Are these sick exercises at work, or is this just a way you are describing how you feel, when you assume people are interpreting you and are being nosy ?
In a commune you are exposed more than usually to how others behave, and if it has a negative atmosphere, this most certainly could affect you negatively.
I understand how much you want and need a job, but practice interview technique and feeling relaxed when interviewed - being too desperate worries interviewers.
Lets see if other readers with experience in being interviewed, can give helpful advice, too.
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