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30 Jun 2011

Low sex drive
Good day

I really need your help. In the last couple of weeks(About 3 weeks), I have lost my sex drive and i just cant get it up even though i want to. I am a 27 year old male, and i NEVER had this problems before. I use to get an erection even if i wasn''t in the mood for sex but now all of a sudden nothing. I get the normal erection in the morning when i wake up and all that stuff but it is really impacting my relationship as my partner feels that there are something wrong with him.
To give some background, we went through quite a tough time in our relationship the last 4 months, but we worked through all the problems and now that the problems are kind of sorted out, we have this problem.
I don''t know if its a psychological problem or if its a medical problem and i don''t know what to do or to who i can talk to. Doctors charge so much that i cant just go to one as i am afraid the one will send me to the other and that it will cost a ship of money to sort the problem out....
Please can someone give me advice to who i can talk to, or what i can try to resolve the problem.

Answer 369 views

01 Jan 0001

Dear Rudi,

The fact that you still experience your morning erections is one of the indicators that in all probability, the problem is not physical in nature. If it was then the problem would also occur and effect morning erections.

I would suggest you consult the Southern African Sexual Health Association website for information of sex therapists in your area, they also have a helpline number you can call to link you with a therapist in your area.

It is not possible for me, based on the information you have shared, to determine any clear explanation for what you are experiencing, other than knowing that it does take some time for a person to do an emotional and sexual catch-up after having worked through a difficult problem in their lives. Also often once we have worked through a relationship issue it then also requires to spend time working through the sexual fall out of the problem, which is not necessarily automatically resolved having dealt with the psychological and relational issues.

It also does happen that a couple's sexual relationship needs to undergo some adjustments after having worked through a problem in the relationship.
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