Ask an expert

06 Jan 2003

oral sex
i have a healthy sex drive and life with my wife.
the thing is.
i enjoy giving and recieving oral
my prob is i give but dont recieve.
my wife seems to not like it and it frustrates me a hell of alot. i have tried everything to lure her into this and have spoken to her about it to no avail.we are botyh extremely hygenic and i know my previous partners enjoyed this so i know the fault isnt with me.
im at a stage that i feel i want to find a woman to try this out as i have forgotten what it feels like.
Answer 411 views

01 Jan 0001

There must be things that you don't like and don't do, that frustrates your wife. You use a very interesting choice of words, eg, I have tried to Lure her....
Let's just look for a minute at fantasy vs reality. I have no doubt that you can find hundreds of women to perform oral sex on you, like your previous partners. Reality check : all those great oral sex beauties are gone, why did they go if the oral sex was so good. Must have been for another reason.
You have now found the woman you want to be with,(well you obviously married her for more reasons than just the sex) but she is lousy at oral sex. So are you willing to give up all the wonderful reasons why you and your wife got married, just for a little bit of head on the side line.
Go figure.
A woman might not like the taste of raw eggs, oysters or semen (you should try yours you might not like it either), but that doesn't mean she don't like you. Maybe if at all possible in a non - luring environment, the two of you can discuss this topic. Maybe a good idea is to do this in non-sexual time, meaning not in the "heat of the moment".
If you write to me at I will forward you a Fact sheet with great drawings and Oral sex information.
There is also great Erotic Sex educational and instruction videos: Sex a Life long pleasure is available at JT Publications for R250-00 for the whole set.
Nina Hartley's guide to : Fellatio and also Cunnilingus

There are also many self help books.

Good luck
Dr Elna McIntosh
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.