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16 Feb 2009

Post divorce-beating myself up
Dear CS,

Im very recently divorced. I try and not focus on the past, but it does slip through and create pain for me. BUT, whats worse is that I am creating a false reality in my thoughts about what my ex is doing without me. I have no-contact at all, so Ive no basis on which to create these thoughts, but i still do. I then beat myself up over rubbish that has no basis in reality.

Is this a ' normal'  response to the divorce process and all the emotions one goes through. Have you heard of any other people doing this.

I know its a stupid thing to do, but I cant help it at times.

Thanks Rick
Answer 418 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

These thoughts are not compulsory, and they prevent your ex from being an Ex. What you describe is part of the very wide range of normal reactions to an ended relationshiop, but one of the many very unhelpful ones. Others do it, but if it is causing you grief and preventing you from moving on usefully, then see a counsellor and work through it
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