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01 Jul 2005

Psychiatrist next?<br><br>Psychiatrist or not?
Hi CS;

Last year I started seeing a psychologist, mainly because I felt I needed help with social anxiety. (I am divorced, but have no friends or boyfriend and I find myself unable to reach out to people or put myself out there, I just can't). So the result is that I live a very isolated existence, just work, home and my daughter. And it really is a lonely hell. My sessions with the psych were beneficial; I have since managed to start doing things like joining a hiking club which I never thought myself capable before. However, even in group activities I seem to keep myself away from others; I make no lasting contacts or form any friendships etc. I would for instance go on a hike, enjoy it tremendously and then go home without really having made contact with any of the others in the group. So the lonely hell continues.

I stopped going to the psych after about 3 months, no fault of his. I just felt I was getting nowhere, although he helped me gain a lot of insight into the issues that I have re undiminished anger and resentment towards my ex-husband (after 5 years; time is no healer here!), excessive fear of rejection, inability to see myself in a positive light or accept myself, issues with my father, the list goes on and on.

Although I had terminated the sessions because Ifelt a lack of progress, I wasn't doing too badly until about 2 months ago. Up till then I had been very conscious of healthy living, eating right, exercising, keeping my weight under control etc. Then suddenly it all collapsed; I started eating uncontrolably (up to four slabs of chocolate a day sometimes, enough to make you shudder), stopped exercising, started picking up weight and just feeling listless, no energy or motivation. I used to get up at 5 in the morning, go for a 2-hour walk, clean the house, write letters and do all kinds of things.Suddenly all my interest in anything was gone; I now easily sleep until 10 on a Saturday morning and stille feel unable to get up or do anything.

Loneliness is such a burden for me, I often think about ending it all. Although I never will, I have a young daughter to consider. But my existence is soooo pointless, I wonder why I was even born? I am now considering going to a psychiatrist, but after my failure with the psychologist, will there really be any point to that? Am I just grasping at straws now because I feel so desperate? And must one be referred by a GP, or can one simply make an appointment directly with a psychiatrist? I don't know whether I am just trying to run blindly in a direction again hoping for a miracle...what do you think? (Sorry about the long ramble...)

Answer 382 views

01 Jan 0001

Sounds like you made useful achievements with the help of that psychologist ; maybe seeing another would enable you to complete the necessary work and become comfortable making real friendships with other people and getting involved in even more hobbies and activities with others. Maybe some meication in addition to the psychotherapy could help, too, as there could well be a chemical depression AS WELl as the uncomfortable habits you need to unform
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