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11 Nov 2006

Sorry in advance, I don't want to hurt feelings or insult anyone, but please expalin to me. Homosexual men want to be women, or they want to be like women? And why? How many of you wear women clothes at home, in private? Thanks
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Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
gay, lesbian and bisexual expert

01 Jan 0001

Hi Anon, welcome to the forum and thanks for this post.

You're at the confusing interface between two unrelated issues: gender identity issues versus sexual orientation issues. These concepts are often seen as one by many straight people.

Gender identity has to do with the social constructs of masculine versus feminine, as two extremes. Some men dress in women's clothing, for example, or even wish they were physically female. Some women chose to dress and present themselves socially in a more masculine manner, and some people are convinced that their physical, bodilly sex and gender are incompatible with their psychological sense of self. These people may choose to have gender-reassignment surgery (male to female, or female to male). Alternatively, they may choose to live their lives as the opposite gender but without medical intervention, such as hormone therapy or surgery. As a collective, this grouping of people can be referred to as transgender.

Homosexuality has absolutely nothing to do with transgenderism - it is related to sexual orientation (whether we're attracted to men, women or both). Gay men are emotionally and sexually attracted to other men, as men, and want to love and be intimate with another man. NOT as a woman. Lesbians, likewise, are attracted to other women and do NOT want to be men - women are very capable of loving each other and forming enduring intimate relationships without one partner assuming a masculine role.

I often hear straight people ask of a gay couple, "Which one is the man and which one is the woman?" - which is of course total nonsense. By definition, homosexuality indicates that they're BOTH men (or women, in the case of a lesbian relationship).

Transgender people can be either hetero- or homosexual in terms of sexual orientation. Many straight men cross-dress (wear women's clothes).

The issues of sexual orientation and gender identity are so far removed from each other that Health24 hosts both a forum for sexual orientation (this forum) and another forum for transgender people.
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