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06 Mar 2003

RAMMED INTO MY UNBORN CHILDS DADS CAR LAST NIGHT!!
Thank you for your reply to Single Parent Since Valentine's Day.Kenneth says he's uncertain about coming back.Says maybe in future but not soon. Not fair of him to keep me hoping.Is he too scared to face the consequences of a definite NO?Took me shopping for necessary items yesterday-very civil-a polite busiess transaction it seems.He spent 3 out of 6 years feeling loveless (engaged).She left him.Told friends that he physically abused her.He pushed me into a cupboard door very hard but otherwise no more than usual emotional abuse.He cries when he comes back-tells me nobody's every treated him so well & he's never had so much luv & fun.Yet he's now left 6 X in 19 mnths.Now that we're pregnant he doesn't "foresee" coming back.I never screamed and cursed at him but lost control last night.I threw a plastic garden chair @ him and drove my car into his on purpose.Appointment with shrink next week-can she give something to calm me?I'm irrational, depro & agressive?(9 weeks pregnant).He's still not told his parents/friends about our unborn child and says he'll do so when he's ready-says he's ashamed for leaving.PLEASE HELP.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Jax,
Good news that he feels ashamed for leaving --- he should be, and it shows that he at least realizes what he ought to do, even if he doesn't always do it. The shrink can discuss how best ou can handle your moods nowadays --- but she'll want to be cautious about providing medication during pregnancy, espeacially at this early stage, to protect the child. There are not necessarily risks, but the choices of medications have to be caefully made, and the uses limited.
Maybe he's lacking in confidence and maturity, and feels overwhelmed by the sitation of the pregnancy. Try not to overwhelm him ( men are notoriously bad at dealing with a woman's emotions, even their own ). he may come right eventually. But steer clear of the creative driving exercises --- not beneficial to anyone !
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