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Question

27 Feb 2003

Self Esteem
Hi doc, I seem to have this incurrable urge to shop whenever im feeling down. I have 3 cubbords full of clothing i buy but never wear. I tell myself i WONT buy anything, but then walk into a store and search for something to buy. Then all i can think about is, ill look great in this outfit and then i wont feel so bad about myself. I feel that if i dont have the best cloths, im ugly!! How do i get over this, and just move on! Im running myself into debt, just to feel better about myself! Ive never had all that much self control. I was previously admitted to a clinic for an eating disorder, which i have overcome. But i just cant get my self image up to scratch. I buy guy magazines, like FHM just to look at the girls, and remind myself .... IM NOT WORTHY!!! And ill never be like them. Ive even gone as far to get cosmtic surgery. But once again, im saving to go again!!!! Because there is always more i want to change!!! Even when watching tv. i drive myself into a pit of depression, because how come those girls are gorgeous, and im.. just not!!
How can i pull myself up, and how can i stop buying cloths or wanting more surgery,and just be happy!!!!
Answer 373 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear Fluffy,
The fact is that, as you describe yourself, the central problem is a poor self-image and a low opinion of yourself. That ties in with the eating disorders. And if at heart you don't feel fond of yourself, it doesn't mater what clothes you buy and drape round yourself, you still won't like yourself. Plastic surgery is also doomed ( sensible plastic surgeons ask fo r a psychiaric opinion before getting out their knives ) --- if you don't like You, hen however much he re-aranges the surface, you still won't be satisfied by the result.
So, you may never look like the girls in FHM ? Splendid ! We need realistic, real girls around, far more than those artificial poseurs. The solution lies not in plastic surgery nor in plastic credit cards, but in entering sincerely on proper psychotherapy with a skilled psychologist, to work on the core issue of your self-regard. Once you like you better, and feel happy with yourself, you'll realize that you have no need for surgery, and you'll look good wearing almost anything.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
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