Ask an expert

23 Jan 2004

Son ( 7 ) is out of control...

My son is 7 years old and struggling to cope with my mom's death ( 2 months now ). We lived in th esame house and my mom reared him. SHe died of cancer and he is really struggling and I can't help him cope.

Pls help !
Answer 349 views

01 Jan 0001

Dear Mel,
I expect this is especially hard for you because you are yourself affected by this grief, so you have your own needs to attend to, as well as his. If possible, professional counselling could be by far the best route --- possibly through your nearest Hospice or branch of the NCA ( NAtional Cancer Association ) you could find someone with experience in this field, or a child psychiatrist / psychologist. An old friend of mine, Rabbi Earl Grollman, wrote a useful little book on explaining death to children, and there are other such books available ; wich can be especially helpful because often part of the problem, apart from the usual difficulties of talking abou death and grief with anyone, there is the matter of explaining things ( to the limited extent that we can explain these ) to a child, and also taking into account the child's age and degree of psychological development, and hence the form of concept of death which they will have. The other dificulty, often , is that this situation forces one to confront and clairfy one's own thinking on issues of faith, and the meanings of death. And that becomes so complex I wrote a popular book about it some years ago, but which has since gone out of print.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
Voting Booth
Have you entered our Health of the Nation survey?
Please select an option Oops! Something went wrong, please try again later.
33% - 9326 votes
67% - 18775 votes