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07 Jan 2013

Stay or Leave??
Over 13 years of marriage and two kids later (almost teens), my wife and i have changed a lot in terms of our hobbies, dreams and aspirations in life as well as our beliefs and outlook on life. We have constantly had very bad disagreements because we each have very different perceptions of our own roles and the other''s role in marriage. The arguments are over basics like how to treat our inlaws, parenting skills, sharring responsibility in the house, the head of the home as well as love languages and how to express affection towards each other. Where i feel i have listened to my wife''s needs and taken solid steps to address her concerns over the years, i feel none of the issues that matter to me are important to her and she will only address what benefits her and in her time. She will not take responsibility for her actions and of late has becove verbally abusive in daily talk, whereas because i come from a verbally abused background, i tend to rather hold back on words when angry so i dont say what i dont mean. I have reached a point where i feel lonely next to her and feel we are complete strangers and at a point where i am convinced i deserve better in life as i have given 120% of me to this and received less than that from my partner, with no hope of change or things getting better. Councelling has not helped, including getting friends to try and talk sense into her. I am at a point where i want to pack my bags into my car and just drive out with nothing else and start my life afresh, even if i am giving up my R2m paid up house and other assets. I have become unproductive and demotivated with a lot of things and need a fresh head that can guide me through what i am thinking.
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