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25 Jan 2008

tired of husband
I am married for 12 years.My husband dont communicate, even if we have problems and I ask him to talk about it he will always say there is nothing to talk about because he know that I always see him as the culprit.I dont see him as the culprit I only want him to talk about things. He never talks about anything. It sometimes feel that I am married to a stranger.He will always talk about things that does not really matter but never talk about deeper things. What can I do as I am now seriously thinking about divorce.I can no longer live with someone that dont share anything with me....

He had a very close relationship with his mother. when she use to visit us they could talk forever but he can never talk to me in that way.
Am I the problem here, I sometimes feel that I might be the problem.

He also drinks to much over weekends then he wants to shout and say what he feel and I hate that part of him,,,,,because I feel he should talk with me when he is not drunk.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Does he respond in the same way if you emphasize that you would like his ADVICE on something, letting it seem less about who's at fault, than how to solve a problem ? I don't see any reason to assume that you are "the problem". He may have grown up trusting his mother, but feeling, for whatever reason, mistrustful of others, and scared to share any deeper feelings or thoughts with them. Have you tried, perhaps, calmly talking to his mother about this, again, askin g her advice, rather than letting it seem like a complaint about him ?
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