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25 Feb 2003

Why can't I sustain a relationship?
CyberShrink,

I'm begining to think there's something wrong with me. I'm a fun, social person and people are esily drawn to me - so I make friends very easily. However, when it comes to having a relationship with the opposite sex, the guy seems so interested in the begining, but after 2 or 3 dates, he becomes totally un-interested. This leaves me feeling unworthy and depressed. Recently, it's happened again and I'm at the end of my nerves over this. What am I doing wrong? I cannot believe that ALL these guys no-good - so it must be me....?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Well, Kam, it doesn't necessarily mean that you're no good, either. Sometimes, even very nice people lack some of the social skills that make it easy to start and sustain a relationship. It's had to tell, from the outside, what may hav gone wrong within these recent relatonships of yours. Have you ever been able to ask the guy ? Not as a big, emotional scene, but simply on parting, to say --- we had fun, it was pleasant, but the steam seemed to go out of things after a few dates --- can you do me the favour of giving it a little thought, and telling me what your view is of why things didn't work out ?
Of course, a psychologicst can provide counselling that can include considering one's social skills, and examining in more detail what happened in the relationsips that failed, to see what can be leaned from them.
But don't let your self-estem and self-confidence drop. You ARE a nice and fun person. If you enter into any relationship expecting failure, failure is almost guaranteed.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
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