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21 Nov 2005

Why the fights!!?
Hi Ya'll.

I went back in postings to see what the havock is about. I am so shocked & rather dissapointed in a few...

Ive been visiting this site for a year on/off.
Even though I have grown fond of sum people, I have never made friends here, as that is not my purpose. So i dont take sides at all.
I have never seen so many cat-fights on here as recently.
Frankly, I think you all who get involved in this ugly name-calling, are killing this site. And it makes you as guilty as the person who starts.
The purpose of this site is to H E L P one another. And I think so far we have dun a good job in supporting each other with similar problems.
What is happenening now so often is the breaking down & verbal abuse. how often do we tell people to get out when abuse is involved in a relationship, then we make ourselves guilty of verbal abuse on here!!?
So should we advice those who get verbally abused on this site also now to get outa this site!!? Is not good for them either!?
We all visit this site for a reason...dont forget. we ALL have problems we must deal with.

Sumtimes my life is a real mess and I use this site to keep on track and it does help. So lets focus on that. Supporting others. and forget the petty nastyness please.
it does no good for nobody.

I know I was very ugly with Buzz once, even though I applogized, it doesnt fix things. and I dont mean to her,(and Buzz I am sorry) I mean for myself. When a person loose your cool & say things that is bad, you just feel low afterwards, so dont do it to yourselves.
you loose selfrespect...

I am sure we love the topics sumtimes, to agree, to disagree, to debate. It makes life so interesting.
but it can be dun with respect.
Pls dont make it unpleasant to visit here.

If we have a bad day & feel bitchy, lets rather just keep quiet....
(goes for me as well, i get those too)

Lets work together to keep this site great!!
Thanx
D
Answer 334 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Thanks, Delene, for some very sensible and helpful comments.
It's funny, I keep recommending the BBC programmes ( with the same psychologist ) about using basic psychology to deal with monster kids --- and exactly the same principals can apply here, to the people who start and continue squabbles. And one of the best and most effective of all those principals includes ignoring the bad behaviour. Ignore the nasty comments --- ANY reply rewards and encourages them. Why is it so hard for so many people to do something so very simple ?


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