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08 Jan 2003

Problems orgasming
I rarely orgasm during intercourse with my partner, which is beginning to place strain on the relationship as he feels I am not attracted to him - which is untrue. I'd like to know if you feel this is a mental or physical problem and ask that you suggest action I can take to improve the situation.

Answer 668 views

01 Jan 0001

I assume that you can attain orgasm when masturbating, but not when engaged in sex with your partner. Are you only having intercourse? Vagina-to-penis intercourse gives only indirect clitoral stimulation, and your clitoris has a central role in elevating feelings of sexual tension. To reach orgasm during intercourse, many women need direct stimulation both before and during penetration. You can try using your own hands during intercourse, or guiding your boyfriend's hands to rub your clitoris during sex. You can also try a variety of positions where your clitoris might get further stimulated. The woman-on-top position has more potential for clitoral stimulation than the missionary position for instance. You can also request direct oral or manual stimulation from your boyfriend before, after or instead of intercourse, verbally letting him know what turns you on the most.

If it's more a matter of whether or not you're allowing yourself to have an orgasm, rather than the physical manipulations to get there.

Dr Elna McIntosh
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
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