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25 Jul 2006

10 Years of Marriage down the drain
We have been married for 10 years. About a year 10 months ago my husband said he wanted a divorce. The next day he said he had changed his mind. We went for counselling and continued our relationship.

I thought things was going very well and that we are both happy, untill I caught him doing the one thing that put our marriage at risk in the first place. The one thing he had promised repeatedly to myself and the cousellor he would never do again. Everytime the promise is the same - a promise of this time it will be different because I really want to do this.

After this last round I said I needed time to think and sort out the fact that I've been lied to again. Maybe I should mention that I am a product of alcoholic parents, but I do not use alcohol myself.

My husband then repeatedly said that I can take all the time in the world as he does not want to lose me and that he understands why I need time. I then wrote a letter where I poured by heart out to him and then he turned around after reading the letter and said he wanted a divorce again. I repeatedly asked if he is sure that he wanted the divorce, because this time I'm not going to allow him to change his mind. Throughout the day he repeatedly said he wanted the divorce as he is doing it for me!

This morning he said he over reacted and that he did not want the divorce!! I'm confused and upset as I believe does want the divorce, but he does not have the guts to go trough with it.

Am I reading too much into this and how many times do you allow your husband to ask for a divorce the one day just to change his mind the next?
Answer 622 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Sounds like he is confused and confusing ! Would a further bout of marriage counselling help, with a focus on his shifting decisons ? Focus on what will be best for YOU ; and remember that nothing is wasted if you can learn useful lessons from the experience
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