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15 Dec 2004

Advice please,.............anyone?
I feel like I am on the verge on a nervous breakdown ..... Ever felt like you are the only person in the world going through pain like this? I am afraid of what I might do to someone if my suspicions are once again confirmed. I am a married woman in my early thirties with beautiful children. Have been with my husband for several years, known him for many years. My problem is that I found out a couple of months ago that he was having an affair. On several occassions he has promised that things are over with this other woman, only to find out weeks later he is still seing her. Its not the first affair, and I am convinced he still contacts her. God forbid I find out that they are still in contact. What do I do? I can't trust him at all. I am not sure something is going on, but I just think that he has lied and broken my trust soo often I am scared to trust again. I am an attractive woman, always pleasing him sexually, does everything a good wife should, always sees to the kids, and home..... For what ? To get a husband that lies, cheats, physically and mentally abuses me..... Sorry guys !!! its just the damage that has been done to me ..... I don't think I could ever get involved with anyone, ever. My self esteem is none existent, and after all this he declares his undying love. I need to know from the men out there, what do you want in a marriage? Why do men have affairs? Does he just say he loves me not to hurt my little feelings I have left. I have offered him his freedom to be with her but he keeps telling me he loves only me, and then I find out he still sees and speaks to her. Could he love me if he is doing this to me?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Oddlt, perhaps, almost everyone going through physical or mental pain, tends to feel as if they are the only person on earth experiencing something so awful. Why put up with continuing abuse ? Call POWA and get a good lawyer. It's not your fault that your husband seems to insist on behaving like a worm. If you seriously want to try to continue the relationship and you think he does, then marriage counselling should be compulsory. If he's not prepared to seriously and sincerely try that, then he doesn't deserve to have you.
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