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03 Dec 2004

advise me quickly!!!!!!!!1
today it's friday, i'm going home i mean my hubby's home, truely i don't enjoy being there but it's must i'll be there, i love his parents but does not like the fact that when i 'm there i have to work over and serve his parents, do the cleaning, etc, i really don't like that idea, although it's only two people staying, in fact i'm lazy to do other people's job, please adviise me on how to handle this situation, i'm makoti of the family and one and only makoti, i don't want them to see my laziness, and another thing that bores me is that it's a rural area and i'm from the location, i don't like that place a bit, how do i deal witha please help!!!!!!!11
Answer 1,035 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

I know, renni, that though this may be culturally acceptable or expected, mainly among the older generations in some groups, it's not welcomed by younger folks who have already worked a hard week and need a rest at the weekends. I think we need to be prepared to edit and revise out cultural traditions, and to recognize that traditions that worked well when the large extended family lived close together, when, perhaps, young women did not go out to work at jobs, whatever, may not be entirely appropriate to 21st century Africa. Looking round the world, it seems to have been the cultures which on the one hand remained true to their ancient ideals, but on the other hand adapted to changes in society and the world, and didn't hang onto all customs that became obsolete or unfair to some in the community.
And similarly, as you say, those of us who are urban in our tasks and pastimes, find the rural areas too slow and quiet for us. But maybe a weekend visit shouldn't be too bad, if it's only the occasional weekend ?
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