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19 Oct 2009

Am I being petty? or am i right?
After a terrible and traumatic situation where my fiances mother insulted and verbally abused me and practically kicked me out ther house I had nightmares etc and was really distraught over it all. I am an educated person, good morals, with a decent job etc, and didnt deserve to be treated in such a low class way. Anyway i vowed to never step foot into their house again and I never want to see that women again either. I choose simply not to associate myself with rubbish like my fiances mother. Anyway, my fiance and i fight often about me not comming to the house, as he says his father says i must come visit and stay over all the time. he says i should just come because it is his fathers house and that i must show her i am better than her. While i feel that I am better and that is why I dont need to come to her house and see her ugly hateful face. In a way i am glad about what happened because I dont have to have her in my life ever again. Am I being petty, or am I being strong. ASnd how to I get my fiance to understand my way of being a better person.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Hi there a.m.,
I don't think you are being petty, though you may be depriving yourself, your fiancee and his father from good times you might enjoy together at the father's home, and in a way may be giving a sense of victory to the nasty woman. Discuss this more with them. Maybe the fiancee and his father need to talk strongly to the mother about how her behaviour was wau out of line and not tolerable, must not be repeated, and that she should apologise to you ?
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