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02 Aug 2010

Am I selfish
I am pregnant with triplets and have decided that I don''t want people visiting me in the future because they are curious to see what I look like. I was just talking to my gran and I told her that my aunt, who never calls me or visits me, said she will come in summer to visit me. She will most probably come with her daughter. Her daughter comes to Johannesburg often but has never visited me or even called me. I even send her daughter b''day gifts and she won''t even bother saying thanks. I said to gran I don''t know why they want to visit me. Gran said because they curious to see what I look like.

I don''t want anyone to visit me because they want to see how huge I am. I also don''t want people visit when I take the babies home after their birth. My gran said I can''t stop anyone from visiting.

But I feel that my babies need to be protected from germs as they will be born premature. People can wait to see the babies when they are a bit older. My gran said I am very selfish.

I honestly don''t care anymore about what other people think of me. Life is all about me, my hubby, child and my babies. If I am not up to having visitors, then tough. I don''t want to be inconvenienced. I want people to visit when I am confortable and have gotten the hang of caring for 3 babies. Is this too much from my side?

Am I selfish? I have been told that I think of only of my self. but if one of my babies gets sick, I am the one who will be taking care of them, not the visitor who spread the germs in the first place.
Answer 442 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Its a shame, isn't it that so many people are just plain nosy, rather than havin any genuine desire to help others. Tell your aunt and her daughter that as they have never previously shown any interest in viiting and seeing you, there's no need for them to start now ; and anyway you will be too busy attending to yourself and your pregnancy to be able to spend time entertaining them.
Your gran is WRONG - you can stop ANYONE from visiting any time you want to - it is your home and you are the boss. And if people insist on visiting against your wishes, you can call the police to remove them.
I entirely agree with your views which would indeed be best for you and for the children. You're not in the least selfish. If anyone genuinely cares about you, they would want to isit only if and when it suited and benefitted YOU, not their idle curiosity. If they want to look at something strange, they should rather look in the mirror.
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