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06 Aug 2008

Boyfriend&#39 s family
Ive been dating my partner for almost a decade. And for the most part I have been happy. His always been a wonderful partner in every sense of the word. Since we have started dating I had the sense that his family did not approve of the relationship, which was later confirmed. In a nutshell the things they said were not pleasant. I never felt their behaviour to be justified and therefore I decided to sever all ties with them. I' ve never made any attempts in trying to get to know them or showed any interest in their lives. Amazingly this has not affected my relationship with my partner. HowEver has I AM getting older and seriously comtemplating a life with this person I am growing increasingly concerned about what I will be taking away from this man I love. I' ve tried attempting to disuss this with my partner but everytime we end up arguing cause I simply cannot stand his family. I had to ask myself really hard questions like if we have children would I allow the child to have a relationship with them??? I KNow it' s seems selfish and unreasonable, but it' s how I feel. Can our relationship and/or marriage survive me not establishing a relationship with these people. Am I asking too much of my partner?
Answer 494 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

How about exploring this issue, perhaps along with others, while seeing a relationship counsellor together ? If they were truly nasty, your reluctance to have a relationship with them ( unless, perhaps, their attitudes and behaviour change ) is understandable. Its less clear whether you;d want to prevent children from being in contact with them --- though their attitude towards the children would presumably need to be discovered.
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