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15 Aug 2011

Cant stand my fiance''s kids
HI, ive been with my fiance for 2 years now and his boys (6 &  8) are living with us now.. Their mother is useless and we have them now. I feel evil, but i just want them away from me. I cant stand them. They are the worst kids, they are bratty, spoilt and i have no idea what to do. I''m on " happy"  pills, but they only work sometimes. Sometimes they can be great kids, but 9/10 they are awful.. They dont care about anyone by themselves.. We are now fighting cause ive had enough and im opening my mouth and talking about what irritates me, but im the disciplinarian in the house, not him... If i dont, he wont, and our house is a war ground with them in the middle. Sarcastically smiling a big F U to me...
help!!!
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

No form of pill, happy or otherwise, can or chould make one content with an untenable position. Some kids are naturally bratty, but this is greatly enhanced and made chronic by parents ( maybe especially after divorce ) who have contradictory responses to such bad behaviours, rather than, as is essential, sharing a set of common rules, rewards and penalties for good and bad behaviour, which both apply to the kids. Otherwise the kids so easily learn to exploit the situation and run havoc.
And if one or both parents feels guilty for the marital break-up, they may become over-indulgent which is bad for the kids, and indeed everyone concerned.
How about some couples counselling to sort out a common approach to these problems ?
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