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17 Jul 2008

Cheated
My daughters father and I broke up in Feb, it was a very messy breakup - He cheated on me and put me out of his house, chose the other woman over me.His family also chose the woman and told me not to ever come near their house with my child - this was her grandmother who said this. We could not talk to each other even about our daughter without arguing and decided to stop communicating all together. This was a good thing because it allowed me to heal and sort out my own life which I did. THen he just waltzed back into my life, asking to see his child. I agreed but stipulated rules. He became this charming person again and once again I fell for his games. I asked about the other woman but he always denied it, until this morning. He turned up at my house at 06h30, when I asked him if he came from work he said yes, later I asked him why he came to my house he told me he was at his mom' s house and decided to come over. Then a little bell rang in my head. When we lived together he used to tell me he was working late and came home at 6 only later did I find out that he came from his girlfriends place. It seems he wants his bread buttered on both sides, he cheated on her with me now he wants to cheat on her with me. I sent him a sms telling him that we should go back to not communicating at all unless its something that concerns our child. Now he says that I' m moody and causing problems, but I dont want my heart broken again because it took a long time for me to heal and I still feel vulnerable around him. What should I do, how to I handle this and how do I stick my ground and not end up falling for a man who broke my heart.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

OK, so he was a rotten man with a rotten family, andf apparently none of them could recognize good behaviour if it bit them on the ankle. Don't believe his pretence of having changed. Go to maintenance court and have the court decide about how much maintenance he must pay, and enforce that judgement ; and let the court alsodecide about his access to the child. Don't believe his excuses or his pathetic atempts o blame everything on you. COntinue with your healing, and don't allow him to damage that essential process.
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