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07 Aug 2008

CS, maybe you do / maybe you dont

(and all the others who helped me when I was so down exactly a week ago)

You know CS as a Shrink (does the " term"  not offend you?) you may or may not know the power of a " simple"  thing you sometimes say......???

You said last week that I focus on the glass that Charne knocked over....I should try and focus on the 9 other times SHE DOES NOT KNOCK the glass really hit me between the eyes and i' ve made a point of seeing just that. Thanx.

Adult CP has also put me into touch with a lady who has a daughter of similar age and disability as Nê  who lives 10k' s from me. This lady and I are meeting over the weekend and she' s also been looking for a support group or tried to start one and she wants to write a book one day....

United Cerebral Palsy Association of South Africa phoned my workplace and was put through to me (we do at least 1 x R500 donation to some charity a month) after I agreed to donate, I asked to be put through to someone who could maybe assist me and I spoke to a lovely lady! They have daycare and full care as well as weekend care - so Im going to go and see her sometime and look at the place. As much as I " hate"  these places or hate is a strong word I am just so scared Nê  gets sexually abused and and and I have to work and let go of my that I can also have some time off when needed.

I asked G a while back if he could arrange for someone to run the shop so we can go away for a week as I desperately need to recover a bit...he said yeah and he' ll arrange with the x wife so all the kids can go to......I nearly lost it and suddenly I was not even looking forward to the " break"  as a break with 4 kids to Durban ain' t my idea of a break, but said nothing.

Then after my " breakdown"  on Thursday my sister read my posting and phoned my mom (all unbeknown to me) and suddenly my mom who can hardly handle Nê  for longer than 2 days or one night suggested that she' d look after Nê  if I want to go away without her.....AMA-ZING?

I then phoned G and said to him PLEASE I need a break, " we"  need a break we have NEVER EVER been away alone...and without a fuss or a fight he AGREED!!!!! I nearly fell over backwards......

Suddenly where I was in the darkest place i' ve been in a long long long time I saw the light at the end of the tunnel and it was not the train....

My sister also had her 1st born on Monday (another thing that was getting to me) a lovely baby see i' ll never have my own child and i' ll never have a " normal"  child and with each sisters newborn it does get to me.....I now can' t wait to see her and be the cool " antie" ....

Sooooo hopefully im ok for a while now.....

Nê  has started saying " thanx"  in stead of THANK YOU....which is so cute.....

On Sunday I went to a friend who' s got a Autistic child who cannot even make eye contact, she just " exists"  no hugs no loves no kisses no " i loooose you mommy"  (loooose = love) and I thought yes she' s not normal but it could have been worse....

Thanks to everyone for helping me through last week and to a mom who although she' s nearly to old to help will help and a boyfriend who sees that sometimes I also need some quality time and sisters who care even if we don' t see each other often.

Love Mom
Answer 403 views

01 Jan 0001

Hey, if I was truly good as a Shrink, would I have so many Big Heads around me ? Ech, just another "simple" comment !
Pleased to hear how things seem to be working out --- well done all round
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