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03 Dec 2004

Emotionally drained
I am soooo tired of my husband, the way he treats me.

1. Last year I got a maintatnace order against him for our son, he paid it for about 4 months - we were in a divorce process - after the 4 months (Sep 03) we tried to work things out. also on condition that I go and cancell the maintanace order, I agreed BUT did not do it because I new what I was dealing with.

2. From Oct 03 till now I had to struggle to get any cent from him on maintance now there are 2 kids, when I ask him for some money he will say I also work he earns far more that I do, in such a way all these months I had to overdraft on my bank account (I now owe the bank about R5500.00 - I am paying back),

3. Sep 04 I filled for the divorce again cause I saw that my marriage is not working, now comming back to the maintance order, last month I asked him AGAIN AS USUAL for money for the kids, and the registration fee for the school as my eldest son is going to school next year, he said what the hurry we are getting divorced we shall talk about the maintanace money when we go to court (next year), I was so mad I then told him I want it as I did not cancel the first order - he was so SUPRISED and could not believe his ears, I then said if I do not get it I am going back to court and he will pay me all the outstanding months, -- I though he understood what I was telling him. he still does not want to fork out any money.

4. I went to the maintance court last week top explain my situation, and was advised to come and lodge a complaint agaist him for not paying, now the problem is how do I deal with the magistrate if they ask me why only now I am complaing after so many months.

I was trying to make our marriage work by not complaining but as usual he took granted of the situation. and I am the one struggling not.

I am tired of fighting with him

Please advice how do I handle him,


4.
Answer 422 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Others here are more expert on these issues, and I'm sure they'll give good advice. If there's a maintenance order still in force, speak to the court and have it enforced. Lodge the complaint. And if the magistrate asks why now --- explain, as you did in this message. You delayed applying to have it enforced in order to see if it would be possible to work out some plan voluntarily, or even to reconcile, but he sabotaged such plans, and has paid nothing though he knows well how much the children need. he took advantage of your good nature --- the magistrate ought to understand that.
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