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07 Jul 2005

Friend emotionally BLIND Any advice please??
A dear friend of mine has been going through SUCH a terrible time with her husband. She can't see what a PR!CK he is (sorry for language but he really is so emotionally abusive).

He has been cheating on her for a whole year! He even admitted this to her but said he wants to work it out. HE'S STILL SEEING THE COW ON THE SIDE.
He keeps changing his mind - one day he tells her he really wants to work it out - and then the next night he stays at a hotel. Come On!!!

They have 3 daughters aged 4,4 and 2 so I can understand that she would want to stay with him 4 that reason.
But the kids would be better off if they got a divorce NOW while they are small instead of when they are old enough to get even more hurt!

But he is constantly cheating on her and in broad day light. Her friends see him with this chick and she knows!!
He says to her that she must get rid of her maid cos they can't afford it. My friend works and needs someone to help her with the kids etc.
Then he goes out and buys a brand new motorbike (they have a car) - they sell their house and have to now move into a flat (with 3 kids). Then he goes off and buys a house off-plan which they obviously can't afford???????? Don't even know who he bought the house for - her and the kids or him and this doll??

They've been to councelling but when the councellor tells her something she doesn't want to hear - she doesn't see that counsellor again. And heaven forbid the councellor says something bad about this dude - because then the councellor doesn't know the situation.

I'm desperate now - she doesn't listen to us (her friends) she doesn't even listen to councellors. It is just a vicious downward spiral.
If I say something to her - that she must think about her kids - it will go in 1 ear and out the other. She will think I'm not supporting her.

Any advice please??
Answer 365 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

You can't make her see what she doesn't want to see. You're describing an awful situation, but only she can do something significant about it, and then only when she stops fooling herself and recognizes what is going on.
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