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Question
07 Mar 2004
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heartbreaking move
My bf is moving to Richards Bay in about 3 or 4 weeks time, he told me today. He's going there for about 2 years to study (the business hes working for is sending him there, all costs covered) and do an apprenticeship. He'll be there for a few months then go to Mozambique for a few months then back to Richards Bay and so on. I'm completely heart broken though that I won't be able to see him for so long. He says its best if we take a break and see what happens in 2 years. Hes says its not fair on me to make me wait for him. But I dont want anyone else, I only want him. I want to go with to Richards Bay, but how am I gonna find a job there, where am I gonna live etc? I don't want to lose him, and I cant bear the thought of not seeing him for so long, or being with him. I cry just thinking about it. What am I to do?
CyberShrink
Dear Crushed,
I'm with Carol on this one. Sounds like a great opportunity for your bf, though a disappointment for you. Discuss this with him and explore how realisic it might be to accompany him. Maybe they can even find a job in the same company ? On the other hand, think over what Jan has said --- it is possible that your bf is far less commited to the relationship than you are, and quite content with a possible separation for this time. he sadness at the sudden news and the prospect of separation is of course entirely normal, though very uncomfortable. You will get over this, in less time than may at present seem possible, to you.
I'm with Carol on this one. Sounds like a great opportunity for your bf, though a disappointment for you. Discuss this with him and explore how realisic it might be to accompany him. Maybe they can even find a job in the same company ? On the other hand, think over what Jan has said --- it is possible that your bf is far less commited to the relationship than you are, and quite content with a possible separation for this time. he sadness at the sudden news and the prospect of separation is of course entirely normal, though very uncomfortable. You will get over this, in less time than may at present seem possible, to you.
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