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19 Nov 2005

How do i Change
This is really a matter that is concerning me alot. I seem to be unsuccesfull in all ways and i want to change. I dont want to be C.J any more.I know God made me the way i am but i had enough. There is no suicide ideas in my Life I love life to much.Im a very soft person and people tend to walk all over me and my children too. I have been married three times and really i must do something Wrong in life.Ive had so many jobs as well i need to get direction.I met this wonderfull woman in my life and i wanna make her happy really happy in all ways. I really need to change and become a different person and really soon. I need to be a better Father to my kids a better Husband a better Bread winner for my family. Up to this stage all is going wrong. My kids are rebellious im not succesfull in life, at this part of my life i should have made a succes already but i just dont seem to exceed to that level. it seems all wrong to me what am i doing wrong what can i do to Change. I wanna become a better Person, its not that i do wrong things in life i try to live to the book as much as possible and try too keep everybody happy from friends family employers kids you name it. Help me please i wanna change!!!!
Answer 426 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Hello CJ,
I think I understand this confusing and uncomfortable position you find yourself in. You sound like a good and pleasant person, but with very soluble problems in various areas --- such as how you view life and other pople, your expectations and how you deal with them, how you view yourself, apparently some difficulties in deciding what you really want, and staying with your decision. And maybe so keenly attentive to trying to satisfy everyone else, that you often end up satisfying few or none of them, as well as never satisfying yourself.
But you have already taken the first, and most essential step to putting all this right, because you have recognized the nature and extent of the problems and you have decided to change. QWhat would help most would be a period of counselling, perhaps with a good local psychologist, who practices CBT (COgnitive-Behaviour Therapy ) which is a practical , down-to-earthmethod fo analyzing what changes you need to make in your atitudes, expectations and behaviours, and making those changes effectively.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
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