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23 Aug 2007

How fair is it
Can someone advise me, I am in a relationship with a wonderful guy, I only have one concern, about a few week ago we were talking about supporting each other as partners, and then the issue of studying came up. He says that when he is studying for exams, he doesn't expect me to go out with my girlfriends or even my family, like to parties or to a night club, because if i was studying he wouldn't do it. He says that if I did it then it means I am not supporting him in his studies and I don't care about our future plans, because while he is studying and preparing for our financial security, then I am partying it means I don't care.

I dont agree with this because I am also studying and wether he goes out or not while I am preparing for studies it does not bother me. For me this gives me time to actually concentrates and study more without him thinking that I am not paying any attention to him. We are not living together yet. Is this right???
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Surely it ought to be a question of what each of you would genuinely NEED from each other such as during studying, rather than a crude tit for tat principle, that said that if he couldn't go out with friends, neither should you. That sounds very petty. I agree with Cherrypie --- and as you don't live together, he wants to control what you do even when away from him and out of sight ? I'd hear relationship warning bells there
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