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12 Jul 2008

how much help for children?
I have not used such a forum before but quite frankly I am too embarrassed to consult someone in person. We are an upper middle class family and all 4 of our children have received good tertiary education. The 2 youngest started their own businesses after failing to get decent jobs in their fields.All 4 of our children have received generous loans from us for various reasons and have been slow but responsible in repayment. Now due to the economic situation in this country, two of them are about to lose their businesses. My husband and I do not know what to do. We could let them sink and know that this is a life lesson, or we could lend/give them large sums of money to keep afloat or change their fields. We do not want to damage their characters but it does break our hearts to see them struggling so. What would you advise?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Welcome ! You needn't feel embarrassed in seeing a mental health professional --- both by their training and their experience ( heard of everything before ) they don't bother to get bothered about what people tell them, and are trained and experienced at putting you at your ease. That you want to help your children is obvious from your question, te problem is deciding how to do so. Simply bailing them out with piles of cash may be a lot less helpful than it sounds --- there may be important life and business lessons they need to learn, and it may mainly help them lurch towards a further failure or 2. Maybe someone experienced in their fields could be asked to look at each business, and advise as to HOW and WHY it has failed, to help them learn to succeed in future ? There's a need for ( and in some professional and business fields there are, I believe some such people ) a form of financial / business advisor / counsellor, who could help you all to reach a sounder decision about what to do, about whether the businesses are saveable, ot what alternative types of business would suit them better
Maybe after the weekend you will get more responses from people with real business experience !
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