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25 Mar 2003

How to get my x husband back
I divorced my husband over a year ago cause I had a really bad patch in my life (suicide attempts exct) After this time alone I realized I still loved him very much. He is not that positive, he also has other opportunities (lady wise). I want him back. There is one other thing his brother and his girlfriend would want nothing more than to have me rather NOWHERE near him than ANYWHERE near him. His mother also doesn't like me much although we got along great before the divorce. He is a truck driver (not the "skunk" type) the normal one's he used to work on a farm in my hometown but is a truck driver now. He spends most of his time in his home town, with his brother and his girlfriend (the brother's) +-2000km away from where I live, so I don't see him that much, and when I see him he is different, whenever I say anything about his brother It turns into a fight.

Please tell me how I can resolve this , I am going to see him this weekend 28/03/2003 and I am scared of what will happen, he was a very good husband to me, I was the one with the problems.
Thank you for your time
Answer 554 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear suzi,
Maybe it's important to realize that though your decision to divorce him may have been influenced by the problems you were having at that time, you did divorce him. It is understandable that his family may resent this, and may not favour the idea of your getting back together again, and he may have moved on, and may no longer want to re-start the relationship.
If you happen to recognize that the divorce was a bad decision on your part, one can udnerstand your sense of regret ; but if he doesn't want to return to a relationship with you ( and the long-distance element would make it very difficult even if he really did want to do so ) --- then it probably won't happen. It might then be really important for you to let it go, and to get on with the rest of your life, resolved to learn from this experience, and not to make the same mistakes again.
If you are going to see him, probably the best you can do is to avoid arguing, or getting into discussions of who is to blame --- but simply to tell him about the problems you were having at the time, what you have been doing to solve them, and the way you happen to feel about him. You'll need to leave it to him to decide what, if anything, more he wants from the relationship. If you are still seeing a shrink or counsellor, these are isues worth discussing with them.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
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