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04 Jan 2005

I need to know if I am being unreasonable
During the festive season I got very very drunk (this is a very unusual occurence and the reasons are many - be that as it may). I actually think that I might have had alcohol poisoning and at one stage during the evening when I was at home - I was convinced that I was going to die. My partner was with me and "taking care" of me. They put me in the bath and ensured that I stayed conscious, etc etc. What I am concerned about though and what I am worried about, is that at once stage they interrogated me about what was going on in my mind. Things have not been great between us for a while and they suspect that I have been cheating on them. They sat next to me on the bed and kept on demanding that I tell them what I had done. I remember telling them that they were being unfair and that I had done nothing but they just kept on going on at me. I feel violated to a certain extent. I feel like they have taken advantage of me and what happened was not fair. That they should never have done that to me. Am I being ureasonable? Thanks
Answer 338 views

01 Jan 0001

I'm sorry to hear of your concerns, but in an odd way, I'm pleased at how many of the questions I receive here, are from people bothered about whether they are being unreasonable --- it's really reassuring to know that so many people WANT to be reasonable, and believe that we have a duty to be reasonable.
People who don't often drink much, can be more badly affected by over-drinking than they realize at the time, and are obviously much less experienced in estimating how much they can handle. And indeed, alcohol poisoning can be serious, at it is effectively an aneasthetic in a sufficient dose.
What your "friends" did in taking advantage of your state of unaccustomed drunk3enness, to pump you for information was wrong, and beyond bad manners. Yes, you were violated, and they were unfair. Of course they should not have done that. They also need to recognize that whatever you might have said would not necessarily be the truth, which is one of the reasons such tactics are not used in proper interrogations --- the information they received, if any, would be a highly unreliable mix of possible truths, with fantasy, and elements strongly suggested by them. And thus worthless.
If someone took advantage of your extreme drunkenness to have sex with you, that would be legally and morally considered to have been rape. And what they in fact apparently did, was not very far short of that.
I'm also wondering why they put you in a bath, which doesn't sound at all useful, and rather unnecessarily risky !
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