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28 Nov 2004

I'm a nag
my boyfriend and i are arguing over silly things,as all couples do i suppose,but the fights are getting worse by the day.He says that i nag him and that i dont let go of isues.How can i get through to him and get him to tend more to my emotional needs without resorting to nagging or sulking? I'm a very emotional person, or a drama queen:) plus i come from an abusive home. Can you pls help me with some tools to make my life easier?

Answer 373 views

01 Jan 0001

Dear ann,
What can I say ? You seem to recognize the nature of your problem, and generally the sort of solution you need --- to become more skilled at sorting out issues important enough to warrant a squabble and ignoring those that are not ; canging the style of Drama Queen towards one where because the emotions expressed are more proportionate to the situation giving rise to them, so that your emotional responses will be more accurate, useful, and respected. Counselling could greatly help you to achieve this. Also, to develop more skills at getting what you want. As you must already have discovered, sulking achieves absolutely nothing useful, nor does nagging ( causing resentment rather than caring). Maybe if you demonstrated more clearly what you want, by the way you seek out, listen to, and attend to his emotional needs, it'd be easier for him to learn how to do likewise ?
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