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10 Jan 2005

Is dit a vorm van mishandeling?
Ek is nie heeltemal seker of ek iets het om oor te kla nie, maar feit van die saak is ek voel vernedere en seergemaak en dit is nie hoe 'n vrou veronderstel is om te voel nie...

My man het in die gewoonte verval om alles wat ek doen en sê te kritiseer. Die dinge wat hy sê is geweldig afbrekend en maak my baie seer, maar as ek met hom probeer praat daaroor is sy reaksie "Jy praat net *&#!!, bly liewer stil!"

Ek is so moeg daarvoor om te hoor hoe sleg ek is en hoe sleg my opvoeding was. Hy sê gereeld ek walg hom (en tog soek hy 3-5 keer per week toenadering). Ek is swanger met my tweede kind en besef ek lyk nie juis soos Mej Wêreld nie, maar hy maak 'n punt daarvan om vir my te vertel ek is dik en lomp.

My vriendin reken dit wat hy aan my doen grens aan emosionele mishandeling en ek moet eerlik erken ek VOEL emosioneel mishandel, maar hoe kry ek hom sover om op te hou daarmee??
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Yes, that's not how a woman ( or even a man !) is supposed to feel. YOur husband sounds like he was brought up in the old-fashioned way that held the false belief that men should be in charge in the mariage, and that the woman's opinions were to be ignored. So what if you don't look like Miss World ? I'll bet he doesn't look like Mr Universe, either. If you feel emotionally abused, then what's happening is probably emotionally abusive. Would he consider marriage counselling, which could sort this out, if he thought it was mainly meant to sort out the problems he thinks he has with you ?
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