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06 Feb 2004

is it OK in marriage
On my husbands birthday, I purposely forgot to wish him, because over the years he never remembers mine, although our birthdays are one week apart - his is before mine. So it was my first time that i "forgot", but now it is a big story. I'm thinking of just going out, to celebrate with the girlz, like he did with the boyz. Is this tit for tat business going to work?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

tits for tats rarely work in the way you want them to. Some men marry women ; some women marry boys.
By all means point out to him how unfair it is to always expect you to remember, without him bothering to do so ( gee, hasn't he even heard of a diary or calenday to remind him ? And how unfair, and juvenile, it is for him to celebrate his borthday by going out with the boys, but not expecting you to be able to celebrate at all. Btu above all TALK about it, and work out an agreement between the two of you.
Maybe he needs to agree to wish you "Happy Birthday Last Week" when it's his birthday, after which you can wish him Happy Birthday Today, and a joint celebration ?
Funny, if he has such a congenitally bad memory, that he always manages to remember his own birthday, isn't it ?
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