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16 Jan 2004

Is the lashing out really directed to me
I recently broke up with my boyfriend of three years because of continous lying and manipulation from him. He has cheated on me numerous times and I phoned him to day to arrange to come collect the last of my things and he always screams at me and lashes ourt and tells me what a B***** I am when all I have done is honestly tried to love him and give him the best that I have. Is this his way of releasing his anger and hurt or did I really mean nothing for three years?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear confused, ]
Of course you did NOT mean nothing ( gee, that's a complex sentence, isn't it ? ) --- you meant a good deal, and he's acting just like the angry little boy who when the games not going the way he likes, sulks and takes his ball hom so as to spoil the game for the others. Of course he's cross --- he's lost a perfect punching bag, someone who gave him all the advantages of having a loving woman in his life, while putting up with and his cruelty and nonsense. quite rightly, he's worried he might not find anyone else who'd put up with him, so easily. Who cares what he wants, or needs, or feels --- he is so obviously unfeeling and uncaring about you, he deserves none of your sympathy or conern. Get on with the good life you deserve, and leave him behind.
If you need to go and collect your things, take a friend and if possible a family member with you, so he won't find it so easy to scream and stamp and perform towards you ; and when you have all your things, change your phone numbers and ignore him completely.
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