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13 Jul 2005

Learning acceptance
I am in my forties and divorced. Since my divorce I have not been in any relationship. Part of the problem is that I am not sexy or pretty and therefore do not get "noticed". I also hate the idea of dating. I want to be in a relationship, part of a family. But the catch is that I have to do the kinds of things that are more effective when you are 18 and gorgeous to get that. And it is not easy. I have decided that I must learn to accept that I will be alone for the rest of my life. But my yearning for a partner and a safe, stable relationship is so great that I don't know how I am going to achieve that kind of acceptance. Are there any suggestions out there, perhaps from some of you who have been down this road?
Answer 472 views

01 Jan 0001

"Sexy" and "pretty" are all in the eye of the observer, and most women are both ; but if they feel convinced that they are not, then it certainly does spoil their appearance by spoiling their self-confidence. And most 18-year-olds are NOT "gorgeous", so the task is much less difficult that you seem to assume. I agree with Liza about the importance of activities, classes, clubs, awhatever --- it keeps you cheerfully occupied, and lets you meet more interesting people, and without the hungry nervousness of the usual pick-up places.
Quotation ---Of course, Agatha Christie was also the woman who pointed out that she had the advantage of a husband who was a noted archeologist " So the older I get, the more interested he is !".
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