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04 Dec 2004

LIVING WITH AN HIV POSITIVE FAMILY MEMBER-HOW TO DEAL WITH THE SITUATION?
Hi, a family member was recently diagnosed as being HIV positive as a result of a work-related health hazard.
I don't have a good relationship with this person cos this person makes it impossible for me to have one with them. Since the diagnosis this person has become more temperamental and moody, and frequently talks about dying. The relationship has gone from bad to worse. I've tried to make things better between us, but there is too much emotional damage done to me that i feel i can't forgive and forget...well not yet anyways.

How does one counsel a person such as this directily or indirectly? Is there any advice out there on how to deal with this situation. Please reply a.s.a.p.
Thank you.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

I understand your concern, but wonder whether it is your primary task to "counsel" this person ? I'm sure after the wekend, you'll get a number of useful responses from our regulars, some of whom are dealing with such problems and issues themselves. It should be forbidden for any testing lab or doctor to ever do the blood tests and inform someon that they are HIV positive, without also providing comprehensive counselling to help them deal with the fact and its implications. Check out the various AIDS / HIV hotlines, and they may be able to point you towards such counselling facilities which you could recommend to this family member. Also, tryn asking this question on our HIV forum, where there is often a good amount of mutual support and advice available from others in such situations.
if part of the stumbling block here is your OWN hangups, however they arose, then some personal counselling for you, would benefit you and help you work out a better way to relate to this relative at this more difficult time in their life.
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